But, the father of sons has even more responsibility in raising boys to be men.
And so, raising 5 boys has brought us to have a fervent and consistent prayer life!
"Of whom much is given, much is required."
Each son is a gift, one that requires some untangling before before becoming an arrow fit for service. This responsibility of parents requires us to lean on our Heavenly Father for wisdom, strength, patience and grace. In and of ourselves, it cannot be done.
God is using our children to sanctify us as we parent them. When we are stumped for what to do, we must turn to Him who is Wisdom. When our capacity to be patient is empty , it is He who refills.
A wise father trains his children, by the principle of Deuteronomy 6:7, when he sits, when he walks, when he is at table, when he lies down... he is mentoring and teaching, growing little men into disciples who love Jesus.
Boys will be boys, unless both parents seek to train them in the character of Godly men. They need hard work that is both rewarding and rewarded. A strong work ethic is the first and perhaps easiest value we can teach our sons. Books that have helped us define our path with our sons are, "Boyhood and Beyond", "Created for Work", "Future Men", "Homemaking", and the Bible. Our current study of Proverbs is particularly rewarding.
Little men find great delight in the encouragement and affirmation of a proud parent. They willingly return to tasks and chores when they know their mama is grateful for their help, they have built strong muscles in the process, and there will likely be a yummy treat when the job is accomplished well.
I believe that a mother's encouraging words are like warm sunshine on a boy's soul.
Men in Training need to play hard, and their play should be honorable, pure, adventures that extol the virtues of manhood. He is to honor every lady, in true gallantry. What better place to learn this than in his play. The little gentleman shows no greater manliness than when he is defending a lady from danger. He is to be to every woman a true knight, to shield her from insult and risk his life on her behalf. In such play, brothers and sisters learn to be loyal friends.
Boys need heroes that are truly good. Many such come from quality reading found in the pages of a G.A. Henty volume, a Jim Kjelgaard, Gary Paulsen, or Douglas Bond adventure. In our society, we must take deliberate action to instill morals and integrity. Our Defense is a battle to purge away those influences which are not noble and of good report. My offensive tactic is to fill and permeate their daily activities with wholesome, refining, excellent choices. One of the strongest fortifications which the human heart can throw up against temptation is the home.
JR Miller, in the book, Homemaking adds this," To every young man life is especially hard. As he goes into it he needs the sympathy of all who love him; he needs the prayers and the help of all his friends. For want of the strong support of love many a young man goes down in the battle, and many who come through victorious owe their victories to the holy affection of truly loyal hearts that inspired them with hope and courage in all their hours of struggle."
I desire my sons to acquire skills that are both fun and useful. I need to sense what they are good at, so I may help point them in a direction where they will be successful.
I think it is so important for a young man to be good at something.
I am striving toward giving my boys a clean, simple, old fashioned childhood, full of love and nurturing, hard work, good play, fond memories of family, and knowledge gained from diligent study, that someday they may indeed sit in the gate and be heard.
My most important job as a mama is to provide a safe haven for my family.
For my sons, as well as my husband.
A cocoon. A haven.
A source of refuge to protect them from the world and its harsh demands.
"The home improves happiness
and abates misery
by doubling our joy
and dividing our grief."
My sons will be tomorrows leaders. They will very likely face more uncertain and difficult times than we. My prayer is that we will be faithful raise them in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. That by God's grace our house will be built with wisdom and established by understanding. (Prov.24:3)